Tuesday, July 6, 2010
IDF = Israeli Dance Force
Soldiers from the Nahal Brigade are expected to be disciplined for posting a video clip on the YouTube website showing them dancing on a deserted Hebron Street to the sound of an American pop song, while apparently on patrol.
I hope they don't get disciplined TOO harshly, as they went right back to patrolling and it looks like a harmless enough gag. I wonders how long they planned this, and how many spotters were involved, aside from the camera operator.
Tectonic Tuesday: Independence Day Aftershocks
"They hate us for our freedom," President George Bush famously said. And he was right. There are few things that fascist psychos and the dictators in charge of places like Iran, China, and Venezuela hate more than a population that is free to speak their minds and guide their own lives.
However, they also fear our freedom, because with it comes the right to dress as we choose. And with that comes scantily clad women. And with that comes earthquakes, as Imam Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi revealed when he brought the world this Allah-inspired bit of insight: "Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes."
With warm weather and U.S. women having the freedom to dress as immodestly as they please at picnics and parades and backyard BBQs, earthquakes in July are only natural. In fact, immodest American women may become this country's greatest weapon when their power is harnessed after the Pentagon perfects the Earthquake Machine!
Yes, they fear us for our freedom. And here are some examples of why, in what is partly a post-Independence Day celebration of immodest American women, but also a continuation of my efforts to spread the wisdom of the Great Imam Slammy (as he is known to friends) to the world.
In July of 1985 Hawke's Bay, New Zealand was rocked by an earthquake and some 35 aftershocks. All because of immodest American women. (Pictured is Madonna, who has corrupted the chastity of men throughout the 1980s and 1990s. She is a bit beyond that point now, but she nonetheless continues to dress as immodestly as ever.)
In July of 2005, an earthquake struck the Nicobar Islands off the coast of India, and Tokyo was rattled by the biggest earthquake in decades. (Pictured is bikini model Jessiqa Pace, who has been making the earth move since the late 1990s.)
In July of 2008, an earthquake struck Southern California, showing that even the United States themselves can sometimes be exposed to the power of our nation's exposed women. (Pictured is singer and actress Jessica Simpson, who has been making the earth move since the dawn of the new millenium.)
In July of 2002 the earth shook in Balochistan and Karnitaka (both parts of India), as well as in the African nation of Cameroon. (Pictured is pop singer Britney Spears, who was the subject of the first Tectonic Tuesdays Case Study.)
And it's all because of the immodest women of the United States of America.
(That's actually Danish photographer Carlotta Oestervang wearing a US flag bathing suit, but the point still stands. She was in New York at the time.)
However, they also fear our freedom, because with it comes the right to dress as we choose. And with that comes scantily clad women. And with that comes earthquakes, as Imam Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi revealed when he brought the world this Allah-inspired bit of insight: "Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes."With warm weather and U.S. women having the freedom to dress as immodestly as they please at picnics and parades and backyard BBQs, earthquakes in July are only natural. In fact, immodest American women may become this country's greatest weapon when their power is harnessed after the Pentagon perfects the Earthquake Machine!
Yes, they fear us for our freedom. And here are some examples of why, in what is partly a post-Independence Day celebration of immodest American women, but also a continuation of my efforts to spread the wisdom of the Great Imam Slammy (as he is known to friends) to the world.
In July of 1985 Hawke's Bay, New Zealand was rocked by an earthquake and some 35 aftershocks. All because of immodest American women. (Pictured is Madonna, who has corrupted the chastity of men throughout the 1980s and 1990s. She is a bit beyond that point now, but she nonetheless continues to dress as immodestly as ever.)
In July of 2005, an earthquake struck the Nicobar Islands off the coast of India, and Tokyo was rattled by the biggest earthquake in decades. (Pictured is bikini model Jessiqa Pace, who has been making the earth move since the late 1990s.)
In July of 2008, an earthquake struck Southern California, showing that even the United States themselves can sometimes be exposed to the power of our nation's exposed women. (Pictured is singer and actress Jessica Simpson, who has been making the earth move since the dawn of the new millenium.)
In July of 2002 the earth shook in Balochistan and Karnitaka (both parts of India), as well as in the African nation of Cameroon. (Pictured is pop singer Britney Spears, who was the subject of the first Tectonic Tuesdays Case Study.)
And it's all because of the immodest women of the United States of America.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
4th of July fireworks on a planetary scale
Independence Day (1996)
Starring: Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum, and Bill Pullman
Director: Roland Emmerich
Rating: Eight of Ten Stars
Monstrous space aliens intent on wiping out the human race launch a different sort of fireworks show for the Fourth of July, leveling Washington D.C. and the rest of the world's great cities. Earth's only hope becomes the surviving wings of the American Air Force, led by former ace pilot President Thomas J. Whitmore (Pullman) and current ace Captain Steve Hiller (Smith). Can they keep a secret desert military base protected long enough for scientists to discover a weakness in the superior technology of the aliens?
Not since the 1950s has anyone made such a grand "aliens destroy the Earth" movie, and I don't think anyone has ever presented quite such an epically heroic vision of the entirity of the American people as we see here. And nowhere but "Stargate: SG-1" will you find bubble-gum sci-fi that consistently shows the U.S. military as the good guys they are.
The formula here is part disaster movie, part action movie, and part sci-fi film. Nothing's terribly original, and the feel really is alot like a 1950s sci-fi film. However, with a special effects extravaganza that I still feel stands unmatched (the fighter-jets vs. aliens and mothership is still more impressive to me than the opening scenes of "Revenge of the Sith", the only bit of film that can compare) and a kind of storyline it would be nice to see in modern movies more often, this is an exciting sci-fi fantasy that provides non-stop entertainment and lifts the spirits.
The writing gets a bit lazy at the climax (well, very lazy actually) and this costs the film a Star on its rating. I still can't feel too outraged at this, because everything up to that point it so much fun. (I won't go into details what this bit of laziness is, because I don't want to spoil the ending... but part of me likes the worst of this misguided ending as I hate it; the dedicated Mac User in me chuckles every time I see it.)
Starring: Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum, and Bill Pullman
Director: Roland Emmerich
Rating: Eight of Ten Stars
Monstrous space aliens intent on wiping out the human race launch a different sort of fireworks show for the Fourth of July, leveling Washington D.C. and the rest of the world's great cities. Earth's only hope becomes the surviving wings of the American Air Force, led by former ace pilot President Thomas J. Whitmore (Pullman) and current ace Captain Steve Hiller (Smith). Can they keep a secret desert military base protected long enough for scientists to discover a weakness in the superior technology of the aliens?
Not since the 1950s has anyone made such a grand "aliens destroy the Earth" movie, and I don't think anyone has ever presented quite such an epically heroic vision of the entirity of the American people as we see here. And nowhere but "Stargate: SG-1" will you find bubble-gum sci-fi that consistently shows the U.S. military as the good guys they are.
The formula here is part disaster movie, part action movie, and part sci-fi film. Nothing's terribly original, and the feel really is alot like a 1950s sci-fi film. However, with a special effects extravaganza that I still feel stands unmatched (the fighter-jets vs. aliens and mothership is still more impressive to me than the opening scenes of "Revenge of the Sith", the only bit of film that can compare) and a kind of storyline it would be nice to see in modern movies more often, this is an exciting sci-fi fantasy that provides non-stop entertainment and lifts the spirits.
The writing gets a bit lazy at the climax (well, very lazy actually) and this costs the film a Star on its rating. I still can't feel too outraged at this, because everything up to that point it so much fun. (I won't go into details what this bit of laziness is, because I don't want to spoil the ending... but part of me likes the worst of this misguided ending as I hate it; the dedicated Mac User in me chuckles every time I see it.)
Happy Fourth of July to US readers!
A picture is worth a thousand words, so here are lots of pictures in observance of the birthday of the United States of America.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
John Nolte has fun with Oliver Stone's films
As part of the film critic slamathon that has followed the release of Oliver Stone's latest cinematic turd, "South of the Border", John Nolte has written one of the funniest career surveys of any director I've ever read.
Big Hollywood: ‘South of the Border’ Confirms Oliver Stone Is a Right-Wing Plant
Of course, it might not be funny unless you despise most of Stone's body of work like I do. He should have stuck to writing scripts for cheesy fantasy films and even cheesier horror movies.
Big Hollywood: ‘South of the Border’ Confirms Oliver Stone Is a Right-Wing Plant
Of course, it might not be funny unless you despise most of Stone's body of work like I do. He should have stuck to writing scripts for cheesy fantasy films and even cheesier horror movies.
Friday, July 2, 2010
'The Twelve Chairs' is unusual Brooks film
The Twelve Chairs (1970)
Starring: Ron Moody, Frank Langella, and Dom DeLuise
Director: Mel Brooks
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
A dispossessed nobleman (Moody) and a conman (Langella) in the recently-formed Soviet Union learn that a fortune in jewels has been hidden in one of twelve chairs the nobleman used to own. They team up and engage in a race against a corrupt, greedy priest (DeLuise), who learned about the jewels during a deathbed confession, to acquire the jewels first. But they first have to find the right chair... and the harder they try, the further the chairs seem to be scattered across the massive Russian nation.
"The Twelve Chairs" is, along with "To Be or Not to Be" the closest thing Mel Brooks has ever come to doing a "normal" comedy. It's a darkly comic tale, but there isn't any of the third-wall antics or anachronisms that is present in most of Brooks' films. No, what we have here are comic actors who are superbly cast and working with a sharply honed script that echoes traditional Russian comedies. (The closest we get to what one might consider "standard" Brooks in later movies is a bit where Moody's character is so fixated on retrieving one of the chairs that he walks a high wire with perfect stability, not even noticing what he's doing.)
It's hard to imagine anyone cast better than than the great Ron Moody is perfect as the twitchy, high-strung ex-noble who grows increasingly manic as his dreams of returning to a life of wealth become increasingly remote. The same is true of Dom DeLuise as the histrionic Russian orthodox priest who tries to turn in the Cloth for wealth. Frank Langella, seeming more handsome and graceful than ever when playing off the lanky Moody and rotund DeLuise, is also the perfect straight man, making sardonic observations and keeping his cool even while other characters get crazier and crazier.
"The Twelve Chairs" is perhaps the least-seen film of all that Mel Brooks has directed, and it's undeserved of the obscurity it is slipping into. I recommend you check it out. (BTW, some viewers might be put off by what seems to be a downbeat ending, but keep in mind that this IS a Russian story! And, if you think about it in the overall context of the situation the characters were in when the movie started, it's really not that unhappy an ending.)
Starring: Ron Moody, Frank Langella, and Dom DeLuise
Director: Mel Brooks
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
A dispossessed nobleman (Moody) and a conman (Langella) in the recently-formed Soviet Union learn that a fortune in jewels has been hidden in one of twelve chairs the nobleman used to own. They team up and engage in a race against a corrupt, greedy priest (DeLuise), who learned about the jewels during a deathbed confession, to acquire the jewels first. But they first have to find the right chair... and the harder they try, the further the chairs seem to be scattered across the massive Russian nation.
"The Twelve Chairs" is, along with "To Be or Not to Be" the closest thing Mel Brooks has ever come to doing a "normal" comedy. It's a darkly comic tale, but there isn't any of the third-wall antics or anachronisms that is present in most of Brooks' films. No, what we have here are comic actors who are superbly cast and working with a sharply honed script that echoes traditional Russian comedies. (The closest we get to what one might consider "standard" Brooks in later movies is a bit where Moody's character is so fixated on retrieving one of the chairs that he walks a high wire with perfect stability, not even noticing what he's doing.)
It's hard to imagine anyone cast better than than the great Ron Moody is perfect as the twitchy, high-strung ex-noble who grows increasingly manic as his dreams of returning to a life of wealth become increasingly remote. The same is true of Dom DeLuise as the histrionic Russian orthodox priest who tries to turn in the Cloth for wealth. Frank Langella, seeming more handsome and graceful than ever when playing off the lanky Moody and rotund DeLuise, is also the perfect straight man, making sardonic observations and keeping his cool even while other characters get crazier and crazier.
"The Twelve Chairs" is perhaps the least-seen film of all that Mel Brooks has directed, and it's undeserved of the obscurity it is slipping into. I recommend you check it out. (BTW, some viewers might be put off by what seems to be a downbeat ending, but keep in mind that this IS a Russian story! And, if you think about it in the overall context of the situation the characters were in when the movie started, it's really not that unhappy an ending.)
Thursday, July 1, 2010
'Manhunter: The Special Edition' collects great work by Goodwin and Simonson
Manhunter: The Special Edition (DC Comics, 2005)
Writer: Archie Goodwin
Artist: Walter Simonson
Rating: Ten of Ten Stars
"Manhunter: The Special Edition" collects some of the finest comics ever created and published by Americans. Originally published in 1973 and 1974 in issues of "Detective Comics", "Manhunter" was a revival and reinvention of a Golden Age superhero of the same name. In the talented hands of writer Archie Goodwin--one of the greatest talents of American comics--and artist Walter Simonson, it was also a high-water mark not only in graphic storytelling but also in adventure fiction that has rarely been equalled in the 30 years since the material was first published. It is a book that every aspiring comic book creator should read carefully.
In 1946, mystery man Paul Kirk (aka Manhunter) is killed during an African safari. However, he awakens some 25 years later, healed and restored through the super-science of the Council, a group of World War II-era scienties bent on reshaping the world in their image. They hoped Kirk would serve as their chief enforcer of their will, but instead he dedicates himself to opposing their fascist goals. He is soon joined by a small group of allies, foremost among them being Christine St. Claire, a intelligent and sexy Interpol agent, and the mysterious Batman.
The "Manhunter" series reprinted in this book consists of six 8-page chapters and a 20-page climactic episode that chronicle events from Paul Kirk's ressurection through his final, cataclysmic showdown with the master of the Council. These stories are textbook perfect examples of how to tell a complex story in a serial format, with each installment managing to provide a stand-alone story while developing both the larger tale and the personalities of its cast of characters.
In addition to the original "Manhunter" series, the "Special Edition" reprint includes an interesting essay by Goodwin on the development of the series (reprinted from a 1979 collection of the series), as well as a new "Manhunter" story that Goodwin was working on at the time of his death and which Simonson finished and presented as a "silent" tale--just art and no words--in memory of Goodwin. These two items are great additions to an already fabulous package.
You can read all the classic "Manhunter" stories online by clicking here. Start with the earliest post first, of course, as blogs always read in "reverse order" when it comes to series of posts.
Writer: Archie Goodwin
Artist: Walter Simonson
Rating: Ten of Ten Stars
"Manhunter: The Special Edition" collects some of the finest comics ever created and published by Americans. Originally published in 1973 and 1974 in issues of "Detective Comics", "Manhunter" was a revival and reinvention of a Golden Age superhero of the same name. In the talented hands of writer Archie Goodwin--one of the greatest talents of American comics--and artist Walter Simonson, it was also a high-water mark not only in graphic storytelling but also in adventure fiction that has rarely been equalled in the 30 years since the material was first published. It is a book that every aspiring comic book creator should read carefully.
In 1946, mystery man Paul Kirk (aka Manhunter) is killed during an African safari. However, he awakens some 25 years later, healed and restored through the super-science of the Council, a group of World War II-era scienties bent on reshaping the world in their image. They hoped Kirk would serve as their chief enforcer of their will, but instead he dedicates himself to opposing their fascist goals. He is soon joined by a small group of allies, foremost among them being Christine St. Claire, a intelligent and sexy Interpol agent, and the mysterious Batman.
The "Manhunter" series reprinted in this book consists of six 8-page chapters and a 20-page climactic episode that chronicle events from Paul Kirk's ressurection through his final, cataclysmic showdown with the master of the Council. These stories are textbook perfect examples of how to tell a complex story in a serial format, with each installment managing to provide a stand-alone story while developing both the larger tale and the personalities of its cast of characters.
In addition to the original "Manhunter" series, the "Special Edition" reprint includes an interesting essay by Goodwin on the development of the series (reprinted from a 1979 collection of the series), as well as a new "Manhunter" story that Goodwin was working on at the time of his death and which Simonson finished and presented as a "silent" tale--just art and no words--in memory of Goodwin. These two items are great additions to an already fabulous package.
You can read all the classic "Manhunter" stories online by clicking here. Start with the earliest post first, of course, as blogs always read in "reverse order" when it comes to series of posts.
